Tulip Drawing by Clemens
When my student Clemens passed away, our class celebrated and remembered his life by drawing a bouquet of fresh tulips I brought to share. Tulips were his favorite subject to draw and he had just begun to draw in his eighties. That day there happened to be a fresh snow and I photographed the tulips on the snowy ground.
What struck me about this moment that seemed to connect with him and so many others I have interacted with across the years is that what can look one way on the surface can be so different on the inside. It seemed to me that Clemens was experiencing spring in the winter of his life.
I made these tulips as an ode to both the joy and sorrow that can come at the beginning and ending of one’s days. As someone who loves words and finds delight in the meaning of names, I am deeply touched by Clemen’s name. His name means “merciful”. I can’t help but reflect on the beauty of this word and the connection to forgiveness and kindness that can emerge when it looks like a story is almost over. These tulips are for Clemens and each one of us who would look and desire for tender mercies to be offered to us and to offer to others.
Leslie and Natalie, Summer 2022
Over this past year I have been thinking about hidden life so much more. On October 31, 2022 I had just finished installing the tulips at MOWA. It is no small task and I was exhausted. As I was driving home for the next hour and a half, my sisters and I began to become frantic as we could not reach our youngest sister Natalie. Later that night, we found out she had died and our world changed forever.
Natalie was such a bright spot, despite a debilitating chronic illness, she pressed on ahead to find happiness and joy in small moments, like the perfect cup of hot chocolate, being an “Aunticorn” and even rainbow peppercorns…
In February, she began emergency dialysis and had a lot on her heart to share. She began a small Youtube channel and it gave her a way to share her bright voice in the middle of a very difficult time. The video I have linked below is one that I think has such tender mercy and I want to share it, hoping that it may encourage someone who feels hidden…. that they may know they are seen.